Something about love and expectations, the experience said
so.
Particularly I have been upset about it because my friend
Lady Sonja asked me about love:”By the way what is new in your love life?”-
Well indeed, nothing new on West I answered to her. ‘But what is new on East?”-
She insists. Curiosities kill the cat as Bretons use to say so moreover this
curiosity kill my Sunday peace. I would like to answer to her as in Serbia
people say:’ On the West nothing new, but on the East just old stories.’’ – But
I did not/ I have told that my good jolly good Breton Abraham is just boring as
most of people of his age and his profession as doctor in hospital in
Cambridge. Once up on the time my fathers have asked me:’’For God sake, why do
you not gone to be married with Abraham. He is calling you every day, sometimes
help and actually he ask for your hand me!?’’ – My father has been outsider
from my life almost 20 years, how could he ask me about such personal things.
This is my life, live it me to run my life in peace, thought I; you just have
not such right. Most of people thought that with me is something wrong when I
abandon such opportunity in my age either they thought that my soul is Ice
cube, loll! Colleagues talk behind me that I am Bitch, cold doctor Hannibal
Lector, which care just for carrier. Honestly I have this music from movie
about Doctor Hannibal; it is my favorite face with specific English pronouns of
Antony Hopkins. When the lambs stop to cry – but just first part another movies
are not so good like this first one! In some weird way I like his behavior,
because know that most of us has such dream. Not exactly to eat liver of somebody
but stupidity of people provoke you to imagine that you grab his heart and
smash him while he is still alive. Did you know, that most of very educated
people, hipper intellectual have such ideas in brain but they did not have
courage to done such things but sometimes the doctors in hospitals after years
and years of practicing began to hate all sick people and they simple kill
people with meds. Most of doctors do not care for patients they just give
prescriptions which could damage organism and in contradiction they kill very
cool! Mostly the old people are main target. I know this on the most of the
examples’.
But shall we speak about LOVE, WHAT IS JUST NOTION for my
opinion like metaphysical question. For instance question like existence of
God, freedom, eternity are just appositional as Kant says. You could not give
categorical proof for them; either you could give nihilist answer. Bloody
tautology, nothing is secure so you are in mess< just one choice which we
have is it to believe in existence of Love, existence of superior Being as is
it God , just to believe in eternity, coterie und coterie. Maybe some of you
could think about me that I am nihilist as Niche who denies and criticize
Christianity and Ethics of his contemporary Church! But in some séance he has
right as Kant has given it proof for his famous Apria’s. He actually says that
God, freedom, and immortality, although they could not been proved or
disapproved, are necessary postulates of rational morality. Indeed they are
since us reasonable human beings we should act by laws of Lord either 10
metaphysical orders. It is another is we rational; did you think that
contemporary man is rational and is it his behavior absolutely by moral laws. I
thought, honestly contemporary civilization is so far of it!? Man particularly
speaking about his behavior in his relations with another people. You could
meet; especially today; very small number of people who are following either
respect Universal Laws so we have such situation that Equilibrium is lusted and
mother earth is obviously disturbed with such selfishness’! So future is
unpredictable.
Speaking about love between two people, male and female it
is something like speaking about what we aspects from it! For instance, man and
women are different physically, psychically and by years and years of time like
Foucault says in his famous book History of sexuality the aspect of man and his
brain and function of reason is so different from women’s brain. Influence of
education and human’s aid in retrospective of centuries has been changed but
the man and women are different in many aspects.
What we could say so about love. It also depended of culture
and level of civilization of particular society but we are speaking about
western civilization and role of female in contemporary time. We\should be
blind, but we know that first role of women is to be mother, second to be good
housekeeper, third lady and just seducer
for her husband, boy friend either partner. You should be very clever to
understand what did you partner expects from you if you would like to keep good
and successfully relationship if you find partner which you looking for. This
is it for female’s goods; she must be very sophisticated and quiet (not
literary sense) but in good moods’ of Vivendi. Always keep on mind that male
should have his own space, his own time, his own friends even sometimes he
should go where he just won’t without questions. Believe me it is better for
female either women or sweetheart to live her partner in peace to run his life
in freedom. Because the males are seekers, they always would like to keep them
eternal freedom beside the wife, children, and daily duties! They just need
space for action, which has some additional target either is just blowing on
the wind. Bet let it be. Women would have an INNER peace and without
misunderstanding if SHE fined mutual language and respect WITH HER PARTNER!
Great expectations are wearing just empty hope which could be for sometimes not
fulfilled and as human being women would be hurtled. So take it or leave it but male have be by his
nature leaded, HIS BRAIN IS of another structure from females so itch women
could try to change cycle of the earth but she could not change the habit of
male, either he love her. Maybe on the beginning everything is like in
fairytale but after become something what we call fatigue. Especially if women
does not have her own world that would destroy her, because she must have her
life just for her! This so simple and equal but every women does not understand
this, when she find her equal partner she thoughts this is one ideal circle but
it is not. Everybody of us has his own habit and togetherness claim to fit one
partner with another; in this case man and women. In my understanding this is
love mutual understanding, equal relationship but respect for another partner
which is without any kind of selfishness either great expectations. Just grab
the beautiful moments in the love, let it them to pass and just wait with
tranquility in soul for new moments. Why I thought such. Because life is not
simple he is full of troubles, problems, lot of possibilities and different
ways. Life is complex of many things and man and women could not be center of
entire life of human being as it is on first sight family. People, women either
man seeks for more, and tiredness and life in one space brought lot of
challenges. Sometimes you could feel this negative atmosphere; sometimes she is
so positive when you could make it. Love is not blind, but love is rich for
women if she know to find right way to her man; but she must have always on
mind that male is different he just need little more space than women. He could
be a priest either mobster; two opposites; but remember the brain of man is
different from women’s. Well indeed most of mans expects from woman to be lady
on the street, seducer in bad, and good domestic wife. Most of women’s expects
from man security, wealthiest, faithfulness, and care. Man could give
everything but you should have to respect his needs if you seek for equal love
as wife, sweetheart or partner! Equal freedom in temporary time means that
everybody should take care about health speaking about sex! But in marriage we
could not expect that your husband would not try another fruit. But it is very
rare in this world for both sexes that in marriage they did not taste just one
time fruit from another store, lol. So love is really metaphysic which brought
to us happiness and tranquility on the stormy ways in life when we know that
somebody has wait for us and think about as without possession. So Lady Sonja
the answer is this:’’Maybe I have found such man now when I am mature, tranquil
and different from my youth. Yes I am the women in love but without great
expectations !
Anja with Love
